I had a panic attack at the grocery store yesterday. I haven’t had one of those in more than 3 and a half years. I’m not sure if the attack was actually sparked by the Austrian store or the thought that in about 6 weeks I will be shopping in an American store.
Now many of you who have never lived in another culture
may be grinning from ear to ear or maybe even laughing over the absurdity of a
“normal” person having a panic attack in the grocery store. And that’s okay.
But I will never forget the first few months of grocery
store shopping in Vienna. I entered this
store that was smaller than many American convenience stores and was expected
to satisfy the hunger of my family from these shelves. I didn’t know what anything was and I
couldn’t read any of the labels.
Packaging and presentation were different than I expected like mayo and
mustard came in tubes, not jars. And
although the shelves were stocked full, selection was limited. Many days I
cried in frustration in the aisle of the store.
But over time, I got used to shopping in this way. My vocabulary increased. We began to find our favorite items and have
the courage to try new things. And then
I would only panic when new problems arose.
What do you do when you break something in the store and no one speaks
English? What if the cashier says a
sentence you weren’t expecting and don’t understand? What if the number screen is broken on the
cash register and you don’t know how much you’re supposed to pay even after
she’s repeated the amount 3 times? And
even then, you finally learn to humbly do the best you can.
Now I am freaking out about returning to the States. (I know you’re smiling even bigger now.) The smallest stores in Midland are at the
least 10 times larger than my store in Austria.
The selections are astronomical in numbers. So instead of choosing from
12 breakfast cereals, I can choose from 1200.
I will be able to understand every announcement, every conversation and
read every label. People will talk to me
in the aisles even if I don’t know them, and I will be expected to answer
back. I will be able to shop for more
than one day’s groceries at a time and pack up an entire car full of yummy
goodies. And none of these thoughts
comfort me.
It will be harder for us to go back than it was for us to
adjust to living in Austria. And that’s
not just in grocery store shopping but in every aspect of our lives. And maybe that’s why I had a panic attack.
